I say dumb things all the time, but I'm far more uninhibited when I'm drunk.
I'd say that the worst thing I've said in the past week or so was upon seeing [redacted]'s new hat, I cleverly commented that it made him look special needs. He, in turn, replied that his brother was special needs (I actually think he's lying about this and just said that to make me feel bad, but who knows. I'll ask his roommate about that next time I see her).
This weekend to The Engineer
"I need your keys, oh and don't get too drunk because I want to fool around later"
"What exactly are you doing? Has that worked before? You need to stop with whatever that is"
To a coworker
"Ugh! He's so not hot" (awkward pause) "He just walked in the store didn't he?"
Side note: The.Best.Weekend. quickly turned into not so much. Details not necessary today, but it was ugly. Stupid boys. Oh, and I'm officially over [redacted]. I realized today that while I thought he was cute, we have zilch in common and I'm definitely not attracted to him. Oh well, it was fun while it lasted.